a precious gift

Day by day I'm getting closer and closer to a new chapter of my life, to the best part of my book, the chapter of motherhood! Who could have ever thought I could be a mom too?!! A lonely girl who always wanted to cross the longest roads of never-reached dreams, is now a mother, or better say a mother-to-be. How can this girl make another creature's dreams come true while her dreams are disappearing in horizon?? They are all gone: her loneliness, her doubts and fears, her wishes and dreams, and…

I'm not sad at all. On the contrary I'm happy. I'm very very happy to be a mom. There was a time when I used to ask God to give me joy, to show me the right way; And now He has. It's been 8 months and half that He has given me all I wanted from Him. I never ask him to give me a baby. But He knew what the best was for me. He knew what could fill the emptiness inside me; He knew what could make me happy the most. He knew it all and He knew me, that's why He gave me this baby. He knew me better than I could have ever known myself! He gave me this baby to change my life, to tell me there are more important things in reality than drowsing in allusions.  He showed me the real reality, he showed me the real ME, the real Narcis, or Narcis in her best, which is Narcis being a mother. So I have it because my lord loves me, because it was time for me to wake up, to grow up and to reach Him. And I love this little creature, not because its mine, but because it's from him: A precious gift!

It’s a baby girl and we are going to name her "yasamin zahra". She is our baby, my little girl, my lovely princess, and the fruit of our love: a little bit of me, a little bit of him!

Narcis

A mother-to-be

2008/1/21